Bidonio - World
World
Bidonio - World
A social network for world news?
Here, we’re talking real news, not Twitter-level chaos. We bring you the best-of in global corruption, a solid dose of ‘climate change is going to finish us all off,’ and, of course, the classic ‘the iPhone is the best phone because Apple gave every journalist a villa with a garden.’ But hey, the news isn’t all doom and gloom. You can follow topics that actually interest you: geek news, movies and series, or even celebrity gossip about their dream—well, more like nightmare—lives. And let’s not forget the important stuff: dudes chasing a ball for glory and millions. Oh, and if you’re into cars, you’ll get plenty of articles reminding you that you’re helping destroy the planet. And you know what? With all this, you’ll finally have something interesting to talk about at the dinner table—way more engaging than after watching a cat roll around on YouTube. Not bad, right?
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A social network for world news?
Here, we’re talking real news, not Twitter-level chaos. We bring you the best-of in global corruption, a solid dose of ‘climate change is going to finish us all off,’ and, of course, the classic ‘the iPhone is the best phone because Apple gave every journalist a villa with a garden.’ But hey, the news isn’t all doom and gloom. You can follow topics that actually interest you: geek news, movies and series, or even celebrity gossip about their dream—well, more like nightmare—lives. And let’s not forget the important stuff: dudes chasing a ball for glory and millions. Oh, and if you’re into cars, you’ll get plenty of articles reminding you that you’re helping destroy the planet. And you know what? With all this, you’ll finally have something interesting to talk about at the dinner table—way more engaging than after watching a cat roll around on YouTube. Not bad, right?
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Screenshots
Quick overview of the app and service design.
Phone
Computer
This overview is just the foundation, the default theme of Bidonio. But hold on, customization here isn't just some basic 'light or dark' option. Oh no, we go way beyond that.
You can totally give it a flawless look: pick your colors, change the background, the text, and even the icon colors. Yep, you can tweak everything until your app is as unique as you are. Because we know you love being fancy.
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The goal of this service?
The goal of Bidonio World? Well, we slogged through Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and Twitter, and it was fun… for like, four hours. After that, it became totally addictive, to the point where we ended up staring at ourselves in the mirror, and from deep within, we felt a massive 'moooo' coming out. Yeah, because these networks are kind of like a placebo for happiness: on the surface, it’s fun, but in reality, it’s misery in HD, with people thinking they’re stars when they’ve got nothing interesting to say. Spoiler: it taught us about as much as 'Christopher Columbus was the first to walk on Mars'—yeah, seriously, that’s what we took away... super fun but totally false.
So, we decided to create Bidonio World. The idea? To give you info on a variety of topics, but this time with really reliable sources (yeah, much more refined and grown-up stuff, haha). Basically, on Bidonio World, at least you’ll know that Christopher Columbus never discovered Mars, but hey… the Moon’s still pretty good, right? Everyone knows that, though, don’t they?!
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How does it work ?
Hold on tight, because using this app is really super complicated... but only if you're under 3 years old or over 130, right? Otherwise, you should be fine. Basically, you have two buttons: a thumbs up (like) and a thumbs down (dislike). If you press like, it means you think it’s cool, and if you click the other one, well... you don’t like it. Simple, right?
Now, if you’re a paying subscriber, everything you like gains authority, like you’re the boss of likes. And everything you dislike? Poof, it disappears from your view the next time you visit Bidonio World. Magic.
And wait, it doesn’t stop there. If you like a media source, you subscribe to that outlet. And if you dislike it? Well, goodbye, you’ll never see their articles cluttering your feed again. Bye-bye, annoying amigos!
The really cool thing is that you can do this with keywords too. For example, you love #Football, but #PSG makes you want to puke? No problem, you like the first one and get rid of the second. Result: all the football news without a single mention of PSG. Beautiful, right? I’ve got my little mix with keywords like #tv, #series, #games, #video, #tesla... My feed is perfect. However, I had to ditch #apple, #ios, and #iphone... Too many pictures of Tim Cook everywhere, and honestly, he has a real mobster look, doesn’t he? He looks like a character from 'The Sopranos,' I swear.
In short, you have your own news feed with exactly what you want to see, plus the trending stuff so you don’t miss anything buzzing. Well, I’m off to check if the latest SpaceX launch has exploded or not. Suspense!
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Limits and access ?
Ah, limits and access, let’s talk about that! So yes, everyone can create their own little playlist at their leisure; that’s nice. But we’re in 2024, so when it comes to current events, that means sketchy media hunting for clicks and an audience in a hysterical frenzy. The result: we’ve developed some well-hidden mechanisms, like a game of hide-and-seek under the couch. Basically, if you haven’t whipped out your credit card for a paid subscription, your likes won’t boost the article’s rating. No need to exhaust yourself creating 1,000 bots to inflate your articles about the latest iPhone. LOL.
And without a subscription, guess what? You don’t have the right to comment. Yes, you can read, but you can’t chime in. Yep, that’s how it is. We want to keep a cool vibe, so if you’re loaded and dropping comments like some barroom poet, know that the media can block you. It’s a must, a matter of legality. But wait, that’s not all: we have a moderation AI that will read your gems in case of a report. It even understands puns and sarcasm. Oh, and it’s been trained with the humor of 'Kim Jong Un,' so just imagine what it’s going to do with your little jokes… and your right to speak.
I’m all alone in the world, please sign up !
Always up for a little boost! Got something fun in mind ?
Ah, still not convinced by Bidonio, huh? No worries, here are some user testimonials from folks who apparently had an existential revelation thanks to this thing. Brace yourself, it's going to be juicy !
CNN :
Since Bidonio World took over, our reports are now broadcast directly into your dreams. Guaranteed audience, or you’re still dreaming
BBC :
Thanks to Bidonio World, we have replaced the United Kingdom with one big tea show. Britannia forever!
The New York Times :
With Bidonio World, our articles are now written in emojis. The written press has never been this expressive.
Le Monde :
Since integrating Bidonio World, we exclusively cover news about unicorns and rainbows. Serious news is a thing of the past!
The Guardian :
Bidonio World has multiplied our readership by 10,000 by replacing our journalists with philosophical chatbots. Long live the digital revolution!
Al Jazeera :
With Bidonio World, our reports are now broadcast in virtual reality, where you can interact with the news. Governing the world, one headset at a time.
Reuters :
Bidonio World has enabled us to transmit news via telepathy. No more phones; thought is the new screen.
Fox News :
Since the arrival of Bidonio World, we've replaced our anchors with celebrity holograms. News has never been so glamorous.
Der Spiegel :
Thanks to Bidonio World, our investigations are now conducted by detective robots. No more mysteries, only facts!
El País :
With Bidonio World, we have transformed our newspaper into an interactive TV series where you choose the ending of the news stories. No more suspense in the news!
Sign up for them, please, please, please !
How much does it cost and how does it work economically ?
Ah, you're curious to know more, aren't you? No worries, let me give you a quick rundown. Here's the deal: at Bidonio, you pay based on your digital closet. The more old socks and questionable mementos you stash inside, the more you'll have to shell out. But if you're just here to snoop around your friends' closets, relax, it's free! And don't worry, our closets aren't made of solid gold; the first one will cost you about the price of a kebab for the year. So, if you want to store your stuff online without breaking the bank, this is the place to be!
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